IF HER NAME IS MARY, WE'D BEST KEEP AN EYE ON HER BABY

According to CBS News, magician David Copperfield has announced his plans to impregnate a woman live, onstage, without physically touching her. Mind you, this phenomenon is scheduled to occur in Germany, where such a feat is not that much of a stretch. But still. Here are the first headlines that came to my mind. Numerous others will, I'm sure, occur to you, whoever you are.

Bleak Magic (or) Where's the Magic in That?

Hocus, But No Pocus.

Deep Trick.

Obviously Has Nothing up His Sleeve.

The Gland is Quicker Than the Eye.

"Oh God, Oh Honey, It's Even Better Than Being Sawed in Half!"

The Great Houduner