BALL GAME

Focus on the Family, Concerned Women for America and the Georgia Family Council are all just gnawing on their Bibles with outrage as they endeavor to stop the financial bid by medioctopus Liberty Media to buy the Atlanta Braves. They oppose the deal because Liberty owns On Command, a company that provides in-room hotel/motel porn movies to lonely male or female lodgers or anyone else with time on their hands and a credit card.

Oddly, this Coalition of the Deeply and Variously Offended who are protesting the deal seem oblivious, or at least indifferent, to the fact that the Braves are currently owned by Time Warner, an outfit that also offers adult fare (i.e. fuckflix) over its cable TV service.

Nor, now that we think on it, are they troubled that pro ballplayers are, demographically, one of the major revenue sources for the hotel porn business.

(As for George Steinbrenner being a convicted felon? Not even on the moral radar.)

God help the national pastime when the obvious graphic sexual symbolism of the hotdog dawns on these defenders of purity. "Honey, there's a bit of mustard right there in the corner of your mouth. Yeahhh. I love the way...Oh dear Jesus, this is Satan's game!!!" (Note religious repture embodied by three exclams.)

The story, should it interest any of you sick bastards, is by AP's Charles Odum at http://www.forbes.com/entrepreneurs/feeds/ap/2006/07/14/ap2880353.html